new york city — Against her biological clock, Tracy Kodek had to make a difficult decision at age 39.
She says she remembers the moment she decided to have a baby herself.
“I was with my best friend and I said, ‘I don’t have a partner, I need to be a mother,'” Kodek told CBS News.
She dipped into her savings to pay for infertility treatment, and ultimately used sperm donated by a friend. After three years of effort, she gave birth to Zola.
“Then I was like, ‘Oh my god, I’m bringing a human home.’ And she was perfect,” Kodek said.
Codec is affiliated with the Single Mothers by Choice organization. With 30,000 members, women give birth to babies alone, like Emma Ramos, mother of 2-year-old Michael, because they’re tired of waiting for their “mate” or simply want to raise their children on their own. This is part of a growing trend.
She describes her life as a single mother by choice as “beautiful chaos.”
As a teenager, Ramos dreamed of having children rather than a partner. Modern attitudes help make that possible. According to a Pew Research Center survey last year, 78% of Americans think it’s acceptable to raise a child alone. However, an even larger number (93%) support two-parent households.
“This speaks to the misconception that we have somehow intentionally handicapped our children by bringing them into the world with one parent,” Ramos said.
Ramos acknowledges that the responsibility of being in charge of family decision-making comes with its challenges.
“I would say the decision is a blessing,” Ramos said. “But I think if I make the wrong decision, I’m the only one to blame. I think so.”
Zola Kodek recently turned 11 years old, just in time for Mother’s Day.
“Being a single mother by choice can be difficult, but like when I was growing up, my mother needed me more than anyone else,” Zola said. “…Every day is like Mother’s Day for me.”
“Everything I do is for her,” Tracy said of her daughter. “This house is for her. My work is all for her.”
