BROOKINGS, South Dakota – While the average age at first marriage has risen steadily nationwide since 2000, South Dakotans are among the youngest to get married.
The state ranks sixth for lowest median age at marriage, at 26.7 years old, 6.5% lower than the national average. On average, women marry at 25.5 years old and men marry at 27 years old, according to the United States Census Bureau (USCB).
East Coast states have a higher median age at marriage than Midwestern and Southern states.
One reason for this difference may be that conservative beliefs vary from state to state.
According to the Pew Research Center, 47% of South Dakotans identify as conservative and 32% as moderate. About 59% of the population is religious, Pew Research Center found. Studies have linked religion to early marriage.
Courtney Dykstra, 23, and Caleb Huizinga, 23, are two South Dakotans following this trend, and they agree that South Dakota’s religious beliefs likely influence why some couples choose to get married early.
“I think South Dakota is kind of going back to the Stone Age. I don’t want to say we’re stuck in the Stone Age or anything like that, but we’re definitely a step behind culturally,” Huizinga said.
Why Many Americans Delay Marriage
According to the USBC, the trend toward later marriage for both men and women began in the 1950s but has accelerated in the 21st century.
While it was once common for Americans to get married in their early 20s, they now often wait until their late 20s or early 30s. The average age to get married in the U.S. is 28.4 for women and 30.2 for men, according to data from the USBC. The median age to get married overall in 2023 will be 32, up from 31 in 2022.
According to the Pew Research Center, young people are reaching life milestones later than in the past: 22% of 25-year-olds were married in 2021, down from 63% in 1980, and only 17% had children, down from 39% in 1980.
There are several possible reasons for this change:
According to data from the National Center for Education, on average, people are pursuing higher education than past generations and are spending their early 20s developing their careers, whereas previous generations spent this time starting families.
Financial insecurity may be another factor in this rise. According to the Institute for Family Studies (IFS), younger generations are holding off on getting married and starting a family until they are financially stable. Having a family can be an investment, so some people wait to take this life step until they have paid off their debts.
What does this trend mean for the U.S.?
Rising median marriage averages are also impacting U.S. divorce and birth rates, according to the IFS.
Fertility rates have also been declining over the past few decades: Women who marry later have fewer children, and birth rates hit an all-time low in 2023, according to data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
According to the South Dakota Department of Health (SDDOH), while South Dakota’s birth rate remains higher than the national average, the past three years have seen birth rates reach their lowest levels on record.
Divorce rates are also declining in the U.S., and people who marry later in life are less likely to get divorced than those who marry younger, according to the IFS.
According to the SDDOH, South Dakota’s divorce rate in 2021 was the lowest since 1972. According to CDC data, the state’s divorce rate is 2.3 per 1,000 people, while the national average is 2.4 per 1,000 people.
A relationship blossomed while duck hunting
Dykstra and Huizenga met during their senior and junior years of college, respectively. Two years later, the couple is planning their wedding and offering advice to those following in their footsteps.
“We’re the pioneers, so to speak. We’re not exactly the role models, but it’s fun to be the pioneers. We’re testing the waters, so to speak,” Huizinga said. “We have a lot of people who are using our information in the planning that we’ve done, and they’re going to use it for their own weddings. It’s super exciting to see that happen.”
The two met on the dating site Hinge and bonded over their shared love of hunting, so they soon went on a waterfowl hunt together near Brookings, and their relationship took off from there.
“So me and my buddies kind of put her in a serious situation when we first met,” Heusinga said.
Shortly thereafter, Huizenga proposed marriage and wedding planning began.
“So, there’s no reason to wait,” he said. “This is just like the next step into the future. I’m really looking forward to marrying her and taking the next step in my life.”
The wedding will take place this summer in Pierre, and the couple has had a busy year working out the details while also finishing school.
“There are still some details to be worked out, but the wedding is basically going ahead as planned,” Dykstra said.
The couple chose Pierre because it’s Huizinga’s hometown and where they plan to live for the next few years. Dykstra, a native of George, Iowa, decided to stay in the state after graduation and move to Pierre with Huizinga. Heusinga and Dykstra both have jobs in the state capital and bought a home together in December.
“We’re paying off our college loans and trying to make our house a better place. Plus, we both work there,” Huizinga said.
He will attend South Dakota State University and graduate with a degree in engineering in 2023. Dykstra graduated this year from Southeast Technical University in Sioux Falls with a degree in surgical technology.
The soon-to-be couple aren’t the only friends planning their next steps for the future: Huizinga said she’s seen a lot of people her age get married over the past few years.
“A lot of my high school classmates are getting married,” he said.
This story was produced by South Dakota News Watch, a non-partisan, nonprofit news organization. For more stories, see: sdnewswatch.org and Sign up by email Get the articles as soon as they’re published every few days. Contact Greta Goede at email address
