Two summers ago, Ali Abuzalam invited his grandmother, Martha Webb, to vacation in Belize. The St. Petersburg, Fla.-based mixed martial artist said that his grandmother, Webb, was his “biggest fan” growing up.
Taking his grandmother on a trip had always been a goal in the back of his mind, but a stroke that scare-fested her health prompted him to take action.
“I was like, I need to stop talking about it and start doing it,” he said. Abuzalam “put together some money and made it happen,” he said. The two first discussed Europe but decided on Belize because it was more accessible to Webb. Webb, who is originally from Mexico and lives in San Antonio, Texas, had never been to the Central American country and was intrigued.
“It was a lot of fun,” Webb said of the entire trip. “It was his dream to take me on vacation.”
In Belize, they dined at fine restaurants, saw monkeys in the wild and took a boat trip to Caye Caulker, where Abuzalam climbed a pyramid while Webb, who uses a walker, watched from the ground. Abuzalam acquired a golf cart and wheelchair for transportation.
Webb said some of her fondest memories were the meals they shared, including ice cream and delicious mallow soup that reminded her of Mexico. “He asked me about my childhood and my best memories. He asked me a lot of questions and I answered all of his questions.”
The two enjoyed this special trip, a type of trip known as “glamping.” Also known as “skip generation travel,” glamping is a vacation spent just with grandparents and their grandchildren. A trip without parents, significant others, or other friends provides a precious opportunity for the two generations to bond.
And the numbers are on the rise: In a 2023 survey of 2,100 grandparents by the U.S. Family Travel Association, 20% said they had taken a skip-generation trip in the past three years, and one in four said they were likely to take a skip-generation trip within the next three years. Trips to museums and cultural sites were the most common form of grandparent-grandchild vacation, and trips typically involve just one grandchild at a time.
Even after decades, those memories are a gift you can hold onto.
Elizabeth McInerney still remembers her grandmother, Colette Mitchell, taking her to Paris for her 16th birthday, showing her the town she grew up in before fleeing the city during the Holocaust. Though Mitchell had taken other grandchildren on similar trips, this trip in 2004 was the first time she and McInerney spent any significant time together alone.
“It was a kind of rite of passage for my cousins, so they were really excited, but also nervous because their parents weren’t going to be there,” McInerney recalled.
McInerney, who lives in Jersey City, New Jersey, grew up watching her grandmother in “caretaker mode,” with seven children and 12 grandchildren. On this trip, she got to see her grandmother in inquisitive, sociable “traveler mode.”
“The only thing she said was, ‘Talk to everyone, because you never know when you’re going to meet your next best friend,'” McInerney said.
On vacation, Mitchell purposely dined with different people; she spoke French to get around. “In Paris, I got to see where she lived, where her parents worked, where she went to school,” McInerney recalled.
McInerney said the 10-day trip is a memory he cherishes because her grandmother is now 96 and “her memory is failing.” It was their first and only vacation together, and it fostered a love of travel that McInerney still has today. “I owe it to my grandmother that I’m such a fun person. She would take me everywhere – museums, plays, the opera.”
McInerney said her grandmother was not a “warm, welcoming” grandparent, and “I’m so grateful to her for sharing this with me.” [vacation] She may not have said “I love you” once during the trip, but being with me was the ultimate expression of her love.”
Courtesy of Elizabeth McInerney via Getty Images
You don’t even need to book a flight to go on a glamping trip.
When Crystal L. Clemons was a child in the 1990s, she and her brother would travel in a camper with her grandparents, Laurie and Velma Freeman, from the Hampton Roads region of Virginia to Lancaster County, Pennsylvania. On the weekend before school started, they would visit Dutch Wonderland amusement park and see plays at the Sight & Sound Theater. During their visits to Lancaster County, the Freemans would also shop at outlet stores for back-to-school clothes, shoes and backpacks for Clemons and her brother.
Clemons said her grandparents had included her and her brother in planning the long drive even before the trip began.
“They went to the local AAA office, got a map, came back home,” Clemons recalled, “and got a highlighter or a marker and literally marked out the route they were going to take. And then they sat me and my brother down and showed us, so now me and my brother can actually read a map.”
On the way there, Clemons would occasionally sit among them at the front of the camper. “Sometimes they would talk to me, but other times they would just seem to be having their own conversations,” she explained. “I’d just watch and observe.”
Clemons recalled a playful argument in which her grandmother told her grandfather, “We’re not going to live to be 50.” [of marriage]”My grandfather said, ‘You don’t have to hold on for another 15 minutes,'” Clemons began laughing, and his grandparents followed suit.
“I learned in that moment that, like marriage, you don’t have to take everything so seriously,” Clemons said.
The summer road trip was just one of many outings Clemons took with her grandparents, including a cross-country drive from Virginia to Los Angeles. “They loved it. They weren’t pressured into saying, ‘Hey, can you take the kids?'” Clemons said.
Clemons’ grandfather died when she was 18, but even into her 20s and 30s, she said she chose to vacation at places like Disney World with her grandmother. “My childhood travels left me thinking, ‘I want to go to this place, I want to go with grandma.'”
Getty Images, courtesy of Crystal Clemons
How to plan your own “glamping” trip with your family.
A glamping trip can be special, no matter where you go or what you do, but there are ways to make it a more positive experience that will leave unforgettable memories for everyone.
If you’re a grandparent…
You’re likely to take the lead on vacation planning, especially if your grandchildren are young: In a Family Travel Association survey, three in four grandparents said they planned and organized trips with their grandchildren.
Alicia Velez, a licensed clinical social worker in Brooklyn, New York, recommends talking to parents about vacation spots that are age-appropriate for their children and the types of activities that kids will enjoy and that will make them feel competent and masterful.
And if your grandchildren are teenagers, Velez suggested going directly to the source and asking them to help you plan a holiday, as this will “foster self-expression in your grandchildren.”
And if your adult grandchildren offer to take you on a trip, accept their offer — this can be a special opportunity to spend quality time together that you wouldn’t get on a regular family trip, Webb says.
If you were my grandson…
Ask questions about your grandchild’s life. Velez said such trips can be an opportunity for grandparents to impart life lessons and for grandchildren to recapture traditions and solidify family traditions. As a grandchild, the gift you give is to listen to what you might learn.
“You’d be surprised to find that many of the questions, doubts and challenges you have are ones they have too,” Velez says. “Whether grandparents or grandchildren, we all want the opportunity to connect, to be seen, heard and loved. Going on a trip together is a great opportunity to do this.”
Abuzalam said he enjoyed the opportunity to have a little more in-depth conversation with his grandmother over dinner. “It was very moving to have her reflect on her life and share it with me,” he said.
Then leave that attitude at home and focus on what’s in front of you while you’re traveling. “It’s easy for teens to feel anxious about traveling with their grandparents, think they’re too cool to do it, or think their friends will make fun of them,” says McInerney, “but seize the opportunity to get to know your grandparents as well as possible.”
“When you’re a kid, you don’t cherish those moments, but looking back now, I’m so grateful,” Clemons said. She recalled her first visit to Lancaster County since her grandmother passed away last December. “I always brought home cinnamon raisin bread for my grandmother. [from Kitchen Kettle Village]”That was her favorite thing,” Clemons said, “and it was devastating that she couldn’t do it anymore.”
Record your memories: “I wish we had pictures, because we didn’t take a lot of pictures,” Clemons said of trips with her late paternal grandparents. “Take videos, if you can.”
And be patient. “They’re slow-moving. They may not be able to do a lot or move quickly, but there’s a lot of beauty in slowing down,” Abuzalam said.
Clemons still remembers many of the basic lessons her grandparents taught her, including how to tie her shoes, ride a bike and drive a car. “Not just traveling, but just everyday life. I learned so much from my grandparents,” she said.
If you’re an adult with living grandparents, you still have time to take a glamping trip – don’t take that time for granted.
“It’s one of those things you’ll never regret,” but you might regret not doing it if you thought about it. “If you have the money, definitely do it,” Abuzalam says. “Don’t think about the money. [to pay for the Belize trip] “Again. But I’ll never forget this memory with my grandmother.”
